Starting Over with Faith, Not Fear

I am deeply saddened by the news about the recent layoffs happening in Oracle worldwide. I know what it feels like to unexpectedly lose a job. I even know the heartbreak of giving your all just to get fired, and even unpaid, after all your effort. I know the shame and disrespect of an angry boss (after my Oracle experience) that extorts you for their self-interest. In fact, I myself was fired from my previous employment. I held back from sharing this because I feared sharing this wouldn't inspire people to become linchpins if they'd get fired anyway. But I have come to realize why this story may be worth sharing.

I left Oracle early this year as I would be taking up a NetSuite Admin role for a NetSuite partner. The company would be setting up operations in the Philippines, and the owner and CEO of the partner company saw my application. He proceeded to interview me and said he was very impressed with my profile. He told me that it was not easy to impress him. I thought to myself, becoming a linchpin lands you on top of the pile of resumes recruiters collect, and does help you find jobs faster. In short, I got the job and I got to work as his direct subordinate. I also accepted the additional role to be a director of the eventual Representative office in Philippines, which was being set up at that time.

As days went by, I'd have conversations with my boss and he'd ask me to do tasks that were fairly simple. I did them, but I'd comment about the things that blocked me from doing my tasks efficiently. By the time he'd reply, I would have already found an alternate way to accomplish the task, and even would have accomplished the task. He would, in a condescending tone, tell me how easy it was to do a workaround. I always felt I had to explain myself to him. This should have been a red flag to get out as soon as possible.

But I continued. As the days went by, he would send the team messages about people being fired because of this and that. Talking about a former team member behind their back was yet another red flag. The messages just added pressure to people, especially knowing that he's free to suddenly fire people at any given moment after one mistake. We had a LinkedIn top 100 member join, who got fired before I could even meet her in person. Then person after person got fired, I jokingly thought, perhaps I'd be next. And boy was I right. He had given me a training with a workflow that showed a flowchart of when I should ask him for advice. It seemed he wanted me to stop asking him questions that I could figure out on my own. Yet another red flag. I believe it's better to ask questions and that the boss would answer, even if the questions are very basic and answerable.

So I took the flowchart in mind. Then I was given a task to ensure the NetSuite Bundle Deployment Wizard had all prerequisites. I read the documentation on Thursday, did not meet with him on Friday, then Monday came. I had finally gotten off my exit interview from Oracle and it was scary and exciting at the same time. I was in a liminal space, in between jobs, and excited for a new chapter in my life - a chapter I didn't expect to be so short-lived.

After getting home from the Oracle office, I proceeded to do some work immediately to work on the tasks, even though I was not really required to work on Mondays. I just wanted to help and make a good impression. I read the documentation in the tasks carefully and noticed some prerequisites were missing. I thought of the decision flowchart and proceeded to install a prerequisite. I thought this would help the boss and the company. I slept that night, thinking of what my next tasks would be. Then, in the middle of the night, my boss calls me. He was frantic. He was angry because I activated a feature that couldn't be deactivated. He said it ruined his presentation and damaged his business. I wouldn't have known that the prerequisite would actually activate the feature. In fact I couldn't have known. It wasn't in the documentation, which by that time, I had semi-memorized.

I quickly found a workaround, but he didn't want that. He wanted me to call customer support and have them disable the feature. If I didn't complete the task by the end of the day, their time, I would get fired. So he woke me up and asked me to get to work outside agreed upon office hours, then threatened to fire me if I didn't get the task done. Of course I knew his request was impossible. Customer support wouldn't call immediately and even they couldn't do anything about the tedious process of defect filing. The earliest the feature could get deactivated was 3-7 business days. I got off the phone with customer support. Then called my boss to relay the information. He then said I was fired. I never spoke to him since.

He sent me a message a few days later and told me what I did wrong - that he only said to check prerequisites and not install the bundle. But he can't gaslight me. I know what he said. Nonetheless, I tried. I really did. He sent me a message another week later and talked about payroll. He said he wouldn't be paying me because of the damages I allegedly made to the company. I did not reply. I couldn't force him to pay me anyway. It was two weeks of work, so the amount wouldn't have been substantial enough anyway.

The worst part was not knowing where to go next and how to provide for my family. The dread was there, but to be honest, I could not shed a tear. Not for someone that extorts his employees and treats his employees like slaves. It was also a bit of relief that that chapter ended. I took some time to reconnect with myself. I can't say I recovered quickly. In fact it took a week before I got the willpower to look for a new job and go on interviews. I was in another liminal space, pondering why this happened to me, and if it really was worth leaving Oracle.

I read The Dip, by Seth Godin, and found some comfort in it. It became clear to me that leaving Oracle would still have been the right choice, even after getting fired. I just needed to lean forward and trust everything would get better. Leaning forward meant hunting for jobs. I had several job interviews and actually wasn't scared I'd be searching for long because I knew my efforts to become a linchpin had led to a wonderful career and resume. Enough to get some clout.

Sure enough, I was lucky to land a job with twice Oracle's pay, with half Oracle's workload. I am now a NetSuite Administrator for Access Group Australia, and have since learned SuiteScript while gaining admin experience.

To those that may have lost their jobs, I advise the same. Give yourself time to pause and reflect. Take the time to focus on the people that love you. Then lean forward. The faster you go through the downward slope, the higher your jump will be over that hurdle. Keep looking for your next chapter. It could be right around the corner.

To those that still have jobs, keep working on becoming a linchpin. It can help secure your future should circumstances outside your control cut you off from your livelihood.